If I ever threw my office computer out the window, I would attach a parachute to it, so it wouldn't get damaged.
11:53 AM Jan 25th tweeted by @mattmaldre (my twitter account for design, marketing, web and tech things)

I like how the word YAY looks like two people with their arms up in the air.
6:12 PM Jan 27th tweeted by @spudart (my twitter account for art, life, and fun ideas)

A black hole is a big mysterious thing. It's kind of like a hole and it's black and ... wait ... I wonder if that's how it got its name?
6:54 PM Jan 8th tweeted by @brewsterrockit (the twitter account for Guardian of Earth. Defeater of space squids. )

Three hand-picked November tweets from @spudart

It would be fun to trade a USA state with another country's state for a few years.
Nov 4

If elevators did not exist, how tall would the tallest building be?
Nov 16

When typing on a keyboard, sometimes I like to think that I'm playing a musical instrument.
Nov 30

My three favorite December 2010 tweets, also from @spudart

It would be fun if random cars made elephant sounds for their horns.
Dec 7

Ponders, what is the relationship between squirrels and ewoks in the forest? friends? enemies? co-workers?
Dec 8

I want to make an igloo in Pioneer Court outside of Tribune Tower http://amzn.to/ePj0hS
Dec 26

I changed my work twitter account from @tribunematt to @mattmaldre this past month. The tribune name was too corporatey. All the Twitter users in the Chicago Tribune don't use "Tribune" in their name, and I felt kinda funny using it in my mine, especially since I don't tweet all that much specifically about the Tribune. Instead I use this account to tweet about design, marketing, and other online stuff.

So if you want tweets about design, marketing and other online stuff, follow @mattmaldre. Here are my top five favorite tweets from the @mattmaldre account during October 2010:

i wish google maps could zoom in under water in the oceans
Oct 19

To use Microsoft Word is to hoard. To use Google Docs is to share.
Oct 1

It's pretty cool that we can copy files on our computer without using a Xerox machine
Oct 26

A tribune security guard called the Trader Joes creme-filled dark chocolates, "Jumbo-sized Junior Mints"
Oct 18

What if friendster made a comeback? That would be miraculous--and somewhat wonderful.
Oct 4

For September's top tweets, three hand-picked tweets from @spudart.

Imagine elevators as the tubes in Super Mario Brothers. They warp you to another level.
28-Sep

IDEA: they should make liquor jelly bellys and call them "Jelly Oh Nelly Bellys"
9-Sep

The number eight is made of two meatballs. I want a number made of three meatballs.
8-Sep

Read more fun tweets from September 2010 in the comments on the Top September 2010 tweets on spudart.org.

For August's top tweets, here's one hand-picked tweet from each account that I use regularly in the past month.

For July's top tweets, I picked the one tweet from each account that I use regularly in the past month.

@DepressedDarth who needs chopsticks? me eat with paws. or just dunk my face into the plate.
http://twitter.com/EwokLumat/status/19670390993

When you roll up your sleeves, do you ever feel like you are wearing capris on your arms?
http://twitter.com/spudart/status/19690364728

Carrying home 4 boxes of cereal sans bag & foursquaring is trickier than I thought (@ Walgreens) http://4sq.com/bg7aLP
http://twitter.com/fourspudart/status/18569999865

Laptop rule: Every laptop has an 18-inch perimeter where no drinks are allowed to stand.
http://twitter.com/tribunematt/status/19859619454

Here's my favorite six tweets from June 2010 tweeted from spudart.

Here's my favorite 20 tweets from May 2010 tweeted from spudart, mattmaldre, and fourspudart.

These are my top ten favorite tweets from April 2010.

Three years ago today I signed up for twitter. My first tweet was very grand:

Signing up for twitter, duh.
-- 4:07 AM Apr 9th, 2007

Here's my eight favorite tweets from the past month:

1. Vending machines should have anti-gravity pulsors, so you don't have to bend down to get your candy.
   -- 1:17 PM Apr 2nd
   
   
2. IDEA: Cute little anchors to keep a teabag from floating
   -- 12:30 PM Mar 23rd
   
   
3. IDEA: next time you walk back to your desk from the bathroom, walk backwards.
   -- 5:40 PM Mar 22nd
   
   
4. Picking up some Dove chocolate Easter eggs @walgreens which will make good bullets for my chocolate cannon
   -- 4:45 PM Mar 20th
   
   
5. I L-O-V-E U-S-I-N-G D-A-S-H-E-S I-N B-E-T-W-E-E-N W-O-R-D-S I-T R-U-L-E-S!, I M-E-A-N L-E-T-T-E-R-S, N-O-T W-O-R-D-S.
   -- 9:56 AM Mar 18th
   
   
6. IDEA: Make a video compilation of you knocking on all the different surfaces you encounter on your commute
   -- 9:12 AM Mar 17th
   
   
7. What if every time you saw a bus, you'd board for one mile and repeat for ten times?
   -- 6:22 PM Mar 15th
   
   
8. I'm thinking of doing an art project where I get a ton of foreign currency and leaving it around the city.
   -- 11:36 AM Mar 1st

Three years. That's pretty cool. 2,000 tweets in that time.

It's the Wednesday after St. Patricks day weekend, and I'm walking down Michigan Avenue to work and I see someone wearing green. I immediately thought, "wow, that person has been wearing that shirt since Saturday!" So I tweeted about how not to wear green after St. Patricks' day,

"Never wear green the week after St. Patricks day, ppl will think you never change your clothes #tip" [link]

And then I come into work and someone was wearing green! Oops! So I tweeted this,

"Never tweet while commuting to work about what ppl shouldn't wear, cuz one of your coworkers will be wearing that when u come in #tip #style" [link]

And then I realized that Wendesday IS St. Patrick's day. No wonder why people were wearing green. I'm such a clueless Protestant boy.

My top five favorite tweets I made in October and November 2009 via @spudart:

For one week I'd like each car on CTA trains to play a different genre of music. Just to see if people pick a particular car to sit in.
Sun Nov 29 16:32:40

I open Psalms up to a random page, the first verse I read is "what is the measure of my days" Rather fitting that today is my bday
Fri Nov 20 18:27:15

I want to pay for stuff with peanut M&M's
Mon Nov 16 08:18:04

I'd like to explore the etymology of the words enjoy and appreciate
Thu Oct 15 14:33:24

When I walk down the hallway at work with no shoes on, sometimes I like to pretend I'm walking on a bed of hot coals.
Tue Oct 06 20:39:35

If you like these tweets, read more @spudart on twitter.

Twitter has some funny quips about balloon boy, you can read the best ones selected at twitter.com/balloonboytweet.


Here's my ten favorite jokes about balloon boy, Falcon Heene:

1. Is Balloon Boy the new King Of Pop?
2. The Balloon itself was cool though. Kind of made me hungry for Jiffy Pop popcorn.
3. Good news...Balloon Boy will be guest hosting Raw the week after next!
4. The Balloon boy story would be way cooler if he was over inflated like the blueberry girl from Willy Wonka
5. wish I went on a balloon ride today too... which is code for, wish I had hidden in the attic all day
6. Yo Balloon Boy...Imma let you finish, but Anne Frank had one of the best attic hiding spots of all time!
7. Balloon Boy hoax about as good as Terrell Owens trade rumors to Bears, just didn't have quite as much hot air.
8. Predicted Post headline: "Balloon Boy Gets Grounded"
9. Balloon Boy : World Champion, Hide-and-Seek 2009!
10. Now assembling my Halloween costume: Cardboard box? Check. Foil balloon? Check. Toy news helicopter? CHECK.

Over 40 more funny balloon boy tweets at twitter.com/balloonboytweet

My top five favorite tweets I made in August 2009 with @spudart:

Wanna see something really exciting? Put an Airborne tablet into near-boiling water.
August 27

RT @jburno "The sin of self-preservation is keeping us from intimacy in our families and our churches" - @jrkerr in @parkchurch
1:36 PM Aug 25

I hereby declare that for the rest of my life I will never buy normal socks ever again.
6:37 PM Aug 14

I just realized that crumbled-up paper makes good snowballs in summer. Office snowball fight!
5:23 PM Aug 5

@VivaSpyGirl GREAT IDEA! Drawing on foggy frozen-food doors! This'll continue the foggy series from the bus http://tr.im/foggy
12:31 PM Aug 4th

If you like these tweets, read more @spudart on twitter.

A friend recently posted on her facebook status, "Goodnight moon... please children, scootch closer." That's really neat. I like thoughtful, short, simple poetic quotes.

It would be cool if there was a twitter account that posted just one interesting poetic quote a day. A quick search didn't yield anything. Closest thing I found was @aworldclasspoet tweets a couple times a day with twitter poems under the hashtag #twitpoem. Although I have to admit, I don't like the slashes in his tweets to indicate line breaks. It forces a structure onto twitter that is kinda awkward.

A nice simple thoughtful poetic tweet once a day would be refreshing. If you find anything like this, please leave a link in the comments.