Here's some other fun tweets from Oct/Nov that didn't make the top five:

I just typed "glassies" instead of "glasses" That's pretty funny.
Mon Nov 30 15:59:42

the number eight, dash, capital F
Mon Nov 30 15:54:01

The strong horizontals in the design of the Western brown line stop are fitting for Western ave, Chicago's longest street
Sun Nov 29 16:22:24

Somtimes when i drink tap water out of my Propel bottle, I like to imagine it's a new Crystal Clear flavor. The super light version.
Tue Nov 24 17:55:54

hisquirrely.com is available. Someone please take it and put up an animated gif of a squirrel waving and saying hi.
Wed Nov 11 08:59:18

Gr8t @jrkerr sermon. We become overwhelmed w discovery of self, which results in pleasure--short shallow experiences of happiness. (John 15)
Mon Oct 26 00:22:15

Found a wrapped cookie on my jacket pocket. Reminds me of college when I'd carry cookies in my jacket
Wed Oct 21 13:40:38

Quote of the day: "When a fog machine fogs all over you sandwich, it makes it very soggy." --Matt Maldre
Tue Oct 20 21:14:21

Potbellys should have a recycle bin in their restaurants for the brown paper bags they give you. Totally recyclable.
Wed Oct 14 22:19:27

It startled me when three out of the four tribune elevators all opened at once! DINGDINGDING!
Tue Oct 13 20:21:35

While laying in bed this morning, I found when I make a fist with my toes, the 4th toe is the last to close.
Thu Oct 08 14:10:08

Arby's cashier's words of wisdom on Chicago losing the 2016 Olympics: "sigh, it's alright, if it was meant to happen, it woulda happened."
Fri Oct 02 16:24:40