If the IBM Building were a person, what would his name be?

Chicago's IBM building. It's a classic. Very simple black box. And now he has a good buddy across the street from him, Trump Tower. Of course IBM traditionally stands for International Business Machines. But here we are talking about two good buddies on the same block. There's a mystery about this fellow, IBM. Everyone calls him by his initials. But what do the initials stand for? IBM refuses to say. What do you think IBM stands for?
I think it's Ivan Burley Mauer. I liked using Ivan, cuz it's a strong name for this strong building. And Burley sounds, well, burly. And Mauer is German for wall. (and I picked German, cuz the architect is Ludwig Mies van der Rohe.) Feel free to leave your I.B.M. name suggestions in the comments. Thank you.