Do you use a knife to spread the jelly on your sandwich? The jelly slides off the knife. The jelly in your jar is left with deep trenches. The serrated blade from the knife makes an awful texture sound when you slide it across the bread. Knives in my peanut butter and jelly jar? No …
There’s a lot of talk about whether the media is overhyping coronavirus (COVID-19). I was wondering how many people I know will be infected and possibly die from COVID-19, so I did the math. People who will die from COVID-19 Between 2% to 3.4% of people who contract COVID-19 dies. Let’s be conservative and take …
There is a 64% chance that someone I know will die of the coronavirus COVID-19. Read More »
Is it possible to be both cute AND unappetizing? Peeps accomplished that with their Gingerbread Men Peeps. They are quite possibly the most dramatic possible combination of cute and unappetizing. So cute, but so unappetizing! The Daily Meal has a funny write-up on these giant sugar-laden treats If you look forward to getting Peeps every …
Gingerbread Men Peeps: both cute and unappetizing Read More »
Cereal, cereal, cereal. The standard quick meal not only for breakfast, but for any time of day! National Cereal Day was last week. Yeah, I’ve been too busy eating cereal throughout the day to really remember about this esteemed national holiday. In belated honor of National Cereal Day, here are my six favorite cereals, in …
A message I sent to a vending machine company: We have a vending machine on the 3rd floor of the Tribune Tower in Chicago (435 North Michigan Avenue, Chicago, IL 60611). Almost every day I get a Pay Day bar. Sometimes twice a day! Today I hit D7 on the vending machine. My delicious Pay …
Is there a health website where I can enter all my cholesterol levels? Then the website would give me recommendations based on the various levels of HDL, LDL, and triglycerides. Actually, it would be super great if this website would also have fields for a comprehensive chem panel with component results for: Sodium Potassium Chloride …
It’s been a while since I’ve submitted a word definition to Urban Dictionary. I’m digging way back to a word I learned as a child, skelbow. Ten years ago, I was shocked to find out that nobody else has heard of this word. I swear I learned skelow as a child. Even my twin brother …
Laying on my desk this morning were a stack of coins and a collection of chocolate. Why would both of these be on my desk? I run a the Maldre Post Office at my desk on the 14th floor of the Tribune Tower. Tribune employees flock to my desk to purchase from a wide variety …
Would you rather get paid with coins or chocolate? Read More »
General Mills’ new policy: if you engage with us online, you can never sue the company. The Consumerist reports: In new language recently added to General Mills’ website, consumers who interact with the company online will be agreeing to give up the right to sue the company in the future. The New York Times reports …
If you ‘like’ Cheerios or Haagen-Dazs, you might void your right to sue Read More »
We all know the Moon is made of cheese. Even the Chinese know, because they are going to the Moon to bring back its delicious cheese. The taste is so out of this world! Why wait for the Chinese to mine more Moon Cheese? You can buy Moon Cheese straight from Amazon. This would make …
