Naming a Chicago Snow Plow

That time I piled 50 snowballs on the Jack Brickhouse statue in Chicago

Chicago is hosting its “You Name A Snowplow” contest once more.

If you live in Chicago, you have a fun chance to suggest creative snowplow names at www.chicagoshovels.org until January 12. (or if you are like me, you’ll use your old Chicago zip code in the submission form)

When the contest wraps up, the Department of Streets and Sanitation will choose the best six names. Each of these will be given to a snowplow in one of Chicago’s six snow districts, adding to the fleet of uniquely named snowplows from last year.

I decided to use AI for a bit of fun with this. I gave ChatGPT the list of the top 50 names from last year’s contest and asked it to dream up 20 more.

Here’s what I asked ChatGPT:

Chicago has 300 baby-blue snowplows. They would like to name six of these snowplows. The names should be related to the Chicago of Chicago. Here are some ideas:

Austin Plowers
B.B. PlowKing
Bean there, plowed that
Benny the Bull-izzard
Best In Snow
Better Call Salt
Big Frosty
Bill Flurray/Bill Flurry
Bozo the Snowplow
C3-Psnow
Celery Salt BAE
Chance the Scraper
Chicago Style Plowza
City of Big Shovelers
Cold Faithful
Creedence Clear Road Survival
DA PLOW
Ernie Snowbanks
Ferris Blizzard’s Day Off
Hey now, you’re a plow star
HeyChicagoWhaddyaPLOW
Holy Plow!
I Pity the Snow
Ice-Ta-La-Vista
Ima B. Salty
Jean Baptiste Point du Shovel
Little Dibbie
LollaPLOWlooza
Looper Scooper
Ludwig Mies van der Snow
Megameltasaurus
Mrs. O’Leary’s Plow
My Kind of Plow’n
Off to See the Blizzard
O-Plow Winfrey
PATROL-SALT-DeSLEET
Plowcasso
Plows on Parade
S’No Worries
Salter Payton
Sammy Snowsa
Sears Plower
Sir Salts-A-Lot
Sleet Home Chicago
Snow Cubs Snow
Snow Motion
Super Bowl Shovel
The Defridgerator Perry
The Great Plow-dini
The Plowminator

Please come up with 20 more.

And here’s what ChatGPT came up with:

Windy City Wiper
Al Caplowne
Deep-Dish Delayer
Navy Piercer
Magnificent Miler
Hancock Heaper
Blizzardy Boardwalk
Chi-Town Thawer
Millennium Mover
Wrigley Fielder
Lake Effect Eraser
Chi-Ice Chisel
Skyscraper Scrapper
The Willis Whizzer
Jazz Jammer
Chicago ‘Bean’ Cleaner
Loop De-Icer
Riverwalk Runner
Michigan Avenue Mauler
Blues Brother Blower

To be expected, none of these names are any better than the original 50. However, I was going to submit them all, just for kicks.

The form only lets you enter one name. I submitted ‘Windy City Wiper’ first, planning to enter more names one at a time. But, after one submission, I got a message saying, “You have already submitted this survey.”

What the freak. What town is this? Of all places, this page doesn’t let me vote twice.

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