Your intergalactic postal address

The Milky Way map

Would you like to know your intergalactic address of my desk at the Tribune Tower? I will tell you.

Matt Maldre
435 N. Michigan Ave, Suite 1400
Chicago, IL 60611-7551
USA, Earth, Solar System
Local Interstellar Cloud, Local Bubble
Orion‚ Cygnus Arm, MILKY WAY GALAXY

It’s right by the Messier 36 of the Perseus Arm.

And you don’t need to include North America in the address. That would be ridiculous to include the continent. When mail is sent around planet earth, do we include “North America”? No. We do not. You know why? Because there is no North America Post Office. When your mail first arrives to planet Earth, it’s the Earth Postal Workers that first sort it. They never hand it to a North America Post Office, because it doesn’t exist. We only have Earth Postal Office, then USA Postal Office.

How many pieces of mail does our solar system post office get a day?

Answer: gazillions. That includes meteors. That’s actually mail. Earthlings are yet to figure that out. Every meteor has a little itty bitty stamp on it.

What does mail look like on other planets?

Answer: I’m telling you. Meteors. Sheesh. How do you think stuff gets shipped around?


Answer: Comets. Solar flares. Intergalactic email and postal mail are the same thing. You just need an IntraConvertTranslabot to convert the solar flares into physical form.

Update: November 17, 2015: 
Google gets very confused when you try to search for an Intergalactic Address. Here’s what happens when you try to search for mine:
The intergalactic error on google maps

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