Ice Breakers Gum has to be the worst gum on the planet.
It looses it’s flavor almost immediately. The “TFC” Tiny Flavor Capsules are little hard chunks that make you wonder if a piece of your teeth is in your gum.
They will be at the Taste of Chicago on Saturday and Sunday (check this for other cities). If you see them. Let them know that their gum sucks big time. Instead of merely spitting their gum back in their face, I suggest a more tatical 7-step approach.
1) Get a free “gum” package from the hander-outter
2) Standing in the same vicnity of the hander-outter, place the gum in your mouth and chew
3) Ask them what they think of their gum.
4) They will say it’s great and blah de blah.
5) Rationally explain to them that it loses its flavor, the TFCs can be confused for broken teeth parts
6) They will try to ignore you, because they will be too busy handing out free “gum.” So then comes the grand finale…
7) Spit the gum out at them (while aiming at shoes or pant leg is preferrable, the hair is an option if you are really feeling gung-ho)
I only chew sugarless gum, so I don’t know about this Ice Breakers stuff, but take a deep breath, dude!
In this day and age, in this litigious society, I wouldn’t be spitting gum at anyone. You might find yourself ejoying balogna sandwiches in jail instead of cheesecake on a stick at the Taste.
Why not start aletter-writing campaign to Ice Breakers?
By the way, did you know that Trident literally translates to “three teeth”?
yes! let’s see if your gum consumer protest gets results before my cottage cheese consumer protest does.
or you could make a gum sculpture that evokes your displeasure. like Erik’s chair!
what would be worse, baloney sandwiches or old gum? ick, i’d rather go hungry!